How to give negative feedback, and why people don't like it

People in general do not like to hear criticism or negative feedback, not even the kind considered “constructive.” The idea of what is constructive may exist only from the point of view of the person doing the criticizing. That is why it feels so good to hear praise: there is a satisfaction we feel when we hear words of recognition.

Positive feedback is important for working relationships. It highlights the value of work that was done, of a result that was achieved, or even of behavior in a particular situation.

But when the opposite happens, that is, when for some reason an intervention is needed to call attention to something, reprimand or talk about an action that could be better, there is resistance. Both from the person who received the feedback and from the person who has to give it.

To help you with this process, Siteware has also prepared a complete feedback template. Click here and download it nowopens in a new tab (in Portuguese)!

But why is giving negative feedback at work so hard? Why do most managers and leaders prefer to avoid confrontation and not give negative feedback to their direct reports?

What is negative feedback?

Feedback is one of the most important practices in people managementopens in a new tab (in Portuguese) and in teams in the job market. Basically, it is a response about an employee’s behavior or performance over a given period. It is essential so the professional knows what they are doing well and can improve every day.

There are different types of feedback, and while some aim to highlight a professional’s strengths, others focus more on points for improvement. Negative feedback, as it is known, is a response about something the employee is not doing well and needs to improve.

The subject of negative feedback varies, and may relate to the professional’s behavior, performance on an activity or even relationships with colleagues and fit with the organizational culture.

Although it is not an easy task, it is important for managers to give negative feedback whenever necessary. This process can help the employee grow and benefit the harmony and results of the whole team. It is also essential for the leader to fulfill their role of coordinating their direct reports.

Why is it so hard to give negative feedback?

Negative feedback, although necessary in the workplace, can create great discomfort for both sides. Even so, professionals need to understand the nature of that criticism and be able to grow from it. Above all, feedback needs to matter for the professional and personal growth of everyone involved.

Below are the main reasons why negative feedback is so hard to give:

Because we fear it may create a conflict

It is very comfortable for a leader to limit themselves to coordinating the activities assigned to them.

Now and then they may even share their opinion about their team’s work in a superficial way. Most managers fear people’s reaction when hearing criticism that points out a relevant flaw or imperfection in work that has been done.

As a result, they prefer to withdraw and not voice their opinion, even when they are dissatisfied.

The fact is that the way we give negative feedback is what needs to be rethought. Honesty is appreciated in every kind of relationship, including at work.

We should therefore be truthful with the people we lead, especially when giving a negative assessment.

What matters is showing that this kind of action contributes to the employee’s individual growth, career and professional success.

Because people take it as a way of expressing displeasure

Culturally speaking, people associate negative feedback with being approved or failed.

We have to change that idea, trying to show the leader’s attitude as an opportunity for improvement we are giving to the person who did the work. Do not let it be understood as mere disapproval.

This way, the employee will accept our argument more easily and will try to follow our guidance in the next opportunities.

Because we want to stay on good terms with everyone

There are leadership stylesopens in a new tab (in Portuguese) that are harmful to the group they lead and to the organization they represent.

Certain types of managers prefer to stay on good terms with everyone, even if it costs them delivering mediocre results to the organization and missing the proposed goals.

This is also one of the reasons why some leaders do not give negative feedback to their direct reports.

It is hard for a leader to drop one style and adopt a new stance without proper training in which this behavior is made evident. In other words, they themselves will have to hear negative feedback about their actions as a manager.

Every leader must learn how to give negative feedback to their employees. Just as we have to learn to say no, even if it hurts some people.

Sometimes it is necessary to take a stance that displeases someone but will result in improvements, both for the individual who received the negative feedback and for the organization, which benefits from management that does not give up on excellence in its results.

8 tips on how to give negative feedback

In the previous sections, we saw the importance of negative feedback and how it can affect team results. However, it is known that this is not an easy task, even for more experienced managers.

In that case, see below 8 tips Siteware prepared on how to give negative feedback:

1. Never give negative feedback in front of the employee’s colleagues.
2. Start the meeting with positive feedback, then move on to the negative.
3. Do not beat around the bush: quickly explain what the conversation is about and do not leave the employee anxious.
4. After giving the negative feedback, listen to what the employee has to say. Listen carefully and do not interrupt.
5. Do not discuss this negative feedback with anyone else. It is a matter between leader and direct report only!
6. Show why negative feedback is necessary for them to grow in the company. Make clear that it is a way to improve and get to know themselves better.
7. Talk with the employee about how this problem could be solved.
8. Draw up an action plan together with the employee, with defined activities and a schedule for when they should happen.

• Good feedback can promote team engagement. Download our free e-book (in Portuguese) and learn more about the importance of engagement: 10 shocking statistics about engagementopens in a new tab

Is it clear to you how to give negative feedback at work?

See a few more tips by watching this video (in Portuguese):

With Stratwsopens in a new tab, the corporate performance management software developed by Siteware, you can, among many other features, track employees’ individual performance, which makes giving feedback much easier.

Transform your company’s management with Stratws!